It’s UP!

I was sexually assaulted by a Caucasian male. I feel the need to say that because I’ve been experiencing another form of abuse from another white male as well. That is more so micro aggression and racist behaviors that can be overlooked if you don’t pay attention. The aforementioned man attempted to insert his fingers into my anal cavity. No lube, request , or remorse when he saw my anger and distress. He literally told me that we hadn’t done anything and that he had no idea what I was talking about. To say that he had no concern of any consequence would be an understatement! Contact the police? Of course I did. This man was so offensive that I an able-bodied young man who could have easily whipped his ass.. Yet, thinking of my license and reputation, I called the police. Only to be met with disbelief that was apparent in the tone and demeanor of the first 3 officers I spoke with. The officers who FINALLY came to my house were human beings. So Much so that the female officer shared with me that she was assaulted. With tears in her eyes, she told me that she didn’t even report the incident, even  as an officer of the law. She knew it would be more work for her compared to the results she would get for him. The stigma, time, money, and effort she would have to put in/up with to prove she was violated. Wouldn’t even be worth the punishment he would receive. Even when you have proof like I did. Like she said she did. I was scared. Not for myself, for every woman that has been through this, that will go through this and is not a grown ass man. Someone who isn’t able to leave on their own accord. It took me to a place where I was the victim in a system that was all too familiar to me. Being neglected in the America as a black male is typical. Yet this was deeper.. this was a violation of my physical being going unheard, and for the most part unseen. I still to this day don’t know how to digest it. Overall, it was a travesty. I relive it every so often.  And to any woman who may read this, I’m sorry that this world is the way it is nOw. I was for women befoRE this.. but now. It’s UP!